I have been such a mess lately. Angry. Hateful. Exhausted. Impatient. No motivation, no self discipline, just rage and sadness.
I don’t know what my problem is but I think I need to catch that criminal and identify it before it destroys my life.
Just the thought of going to work makes me so anxious that I don’t think it’s worth doing anything other then sitting at home. Home has been difficult too, though. It seems that it’s always been either one or the other going well or horrible but never both. Last year both were well which was awesome. Right now both suck.
I hate my job. I have nothing to look forward to at home. I know that my life goal is to change the world but I’m clueless how to start. Well no, not clueless. I know I need to start with myself. I just don’t know how to fix myself.
I wrote that yesterday morning and again by the afternoon all kinds of events had occurred to change everything.
My boss is being transferred to another store. They do this with all managers and assistant managers pretty often to keep policies at all locations relatively the same. Unfortunately it has never been a good thing for the actual people in any of the cases I’ve seen. They’re moving the manager to our store to give her a location closer to her house but making this manager increase his drive time daily from ten minutes each way to almost an hour each way. Hopefully the change will give him a new store to straighten up and get him interested in his job again because I could see the monotony has really been getting to him.
Ken got a big raise, so hopefully I can go part time soon. I hate my job.
I have a realtor set up to come by Friday to talk about options with our houses. Who needs two?